“My husband doesn’t understand this and, although he won’t come out and say it, I don’t think he really even supports me in it” she said, on the verge of tears.
The “it” being her desire to quit using sugar compulsively.
You may or may not have heard that sugar dependency, well all dependencies really, are made worse, in part, by isolation, by loneliness.
Almost all modalities of change agree that community plays a big part in the process of changing behaviors.
People who have issues with food and sugar, for various reasons isolate themselves from their friends and family, from the world really.
There are lots of reasons why.
The biggest of which is shame.
Entire books have been written about the link between shame and substance use disorders.
A lot of folks mistakenly believe that they are experiencing some shame because of their inability to stick to their diet or food plan or from the weight gain side effect of overusing sugar.
But in reality, the shame usually predates the misuse and the weight gain.
In other words, we are numbing ourselves with sugar to cover up bad or unresolved feelings from our past and to deal with unpleasant thoughts and feelings in the present.
Look, I get that most people want to just lose a few pounds and sugar seems to be holding them back because they keep getting drawn back to using it – despite numerous attempts to stop.
I also get that you don’t want “dredge up your past” and/or think about why you might not be able to just quit sugar at will.
Here at SugarAddiction.com we are fast developing the reputation for helping folks that have, quite literally, tried everything else.
If that’s you – give me an “That would be me!” — out loud right now.
Don’t worry about the person next to you on the train! 🙂
Over the years it’s become like an assembly line.
The same things happen at the same times.
Like when people start to come off sugar – certain things happen. Some physical, some mental, some emotional.
Like clockwork. You can almost set your watch by it.
Sure each person is a little different but overall the process is pretty much the same.
And one of the key indicators to whether or not a person makes it long term and comes to some type of peace with all this is whether or not they reach out and let some other folks know them.
By building relationships with other people who are at the same place, and want the same things, we walk out of our isolation and we release the shame.
We are happy in all phases of the process because we have friends we can call and talk it through.
Friends who support us and, quite honestly, know us for who we are and not the mask we show the world.
We’ve all had that type of friend once in our lives.
You know the one. The friend that doesn’t judge you. Who respects whatever you’re going through and for whom you do the exact same thing.
And if you have never had that and it feels like something that might be helpful with this Damn sugar thingy – then please join us today and let’s get on with it – shall we?
Look, in all the tests out there I score in the 99% percentile for introversion. Only 1 percent of the population is as introverted as me. Reaching out to other folks to tell them I couldn’t do something, that I was weak in this area – may have been the hardest thing I’ve ever done in my life.
But it was also the best.
I hope you want to change more than you want to stay the same too.
Seriously, above the birth of my children, reaching out and asking for help was the most important things I’ve ever done.
Because if I hadn’t done it I wouldn’t be writing you today. I’d be dead or worse – alive and living with all these metabolic syndrome maladies like my parents. I hate to get melodramatic but it’s true. Quit Sugar Now
