What is it with extra weight and being mean to one’s self?
The two seem to be inextricably linked.
With extra weight comes the negative self-talk.
With the negative self-talk comes the self-defeating attitudes and behavior.
And so it goes, on and on, in a downward spiral.
Lot’s of folks tell me early on that they are nice to themselves, kind in their self-talk.
What emerges during sugar withdrawals seems to contradict that rosy ideal.
No judgment, no shame.
“Just the facts ma’am.” …Joe Friday ..Dragnet.
They fight me tooth and nail about the idea that sugar has played with and manipulated their emotions since they were children.
“Just give me the right food, the right diet, and exercise and I can quit and get slim again.” Is the constant refrain.
**Quick side note. We don’t really focus on weight loss that much but folks do normally come to us – at first – thinking that’s why they need to quit sugar. That and for health reasons.**
But permanent, lasting weight loss is one of the by-products of our work.
Once folks don’t have the sugar to fall back on for emotional management then the real fun begins.
Emotional work that we would have normally done growing up, we now have to do as adults.
So much of what we do is to help people see the power sugar has had in their life.
To do that we ask folks to just write down what they are feeling – not thinking – as they walk this path.
Be a dispassionate outside observer. No different than a meditation teacher would instruct someone to focus on their breathing.
Our tool for that is the simple and beautiful journal. A journal can take any form. It can be online(but be careful) or it can be a cheap notebook you buy just for this.
What we recommend is that you start your journey of self-compassion with a truly beautiful bound journal. Yeah, a really fancy bound book with blank pages!
Make this journey special. Make it mean something.
Let this slight extravagant purchase be your line in the sand to be kind to yourself in this process. So eventually you can be kind to yourself all the time.
So what do you write in this beautiful and, by almost everyone’s standards, expensive journal?
You write how you feel.
Did you just feel a tinge of pulling back as you read that? A feeling of – “not me”?
Then you are the perfect candidate.
There are many other reactions to the idea of writing our feelings out. All are valid. The reaction to this part of the lessons is always varied. That’s OK.
What we’re trying to help you understand is that you may ingest sugar for reasons other than “you feel like some ice cream” or your tea tastes better with sugar.
Lot’s of our folks were, or are, binge eaters so they know that the reasons are more complex. But the folks that have never binged or don’t have large amounts of weight to lose don’t really get the connections.
That’s OK.
The primary lesson is to be kind to ourselves – regardless of where we are on the path.
Journaling only makes clear that we are not always as kind as we think we are.
It also makes clear the positive aspects of our journey. It chronicles the successes along the way.
We can literally go back a read about “the person we used to be.”
We can see profound shifts.
This has been a very simple view of a topic that requires some education. If you’d like to join us please feel free to hop over to Quit Sugar Now and see how this all works.
What I want to stress, outside of the importance of journaling during your sugar journey, is the self-compassion.
Many folks don’t follow the journaling suggestion and do fine.
But almost no one, who has shown a propensity to abuse sugar, has escaped the negative self-talk trap. The trap of putting others before themselves.
This we find is almost universal.
It is a much harder “habit” to unwind.
It takes support. It takes acceptance. Both self-acceptance and acceptance from others who understand.
If you’re ready to at least look under the hood a little, if you’ve tried everything and sugar is still beating you up a little – then jump over here and let’s do this thing. Quit Sugar Now.
For a very limited time, I am sitting with everyone who joins us for 30 minutes to formulate the best plan for them. I can’t continue this much longer as we have so many people joining us daily. Please take me up on this. Quit Sugar Now.
